like a shadow

in the dream, i’m visiting a residency/retreat center/community
in northern california and i go for a walk
up the curve of road and encounter a black bear
in response to which i both make myself big while making a lot of noise
and also run like hell
and later this bear lounges in the sun in a resdient’s yard
and people are close and familiar with this creature
and unafraid
in the other dream, the family is back and we’re all going out for a meal or gathering
and on the walk there i realize i’m not wearing shoes
cynthia offers some white with blue/teal accents running shoes
but for some reason i decline them
and when i open the door to the house/cabin/place with my shoes,
a young moose and young lion (that the fam brought back) greet me
the moose disappears
but the lion, who could easily kill me,i sit with
petting her in the places i know to pet a cat

it’s that place of precision  bruin says
and some of the questions are:
who do i want to be in this world?
what do i value in this world?

the small leaves i pluck and put in my mout off the peppergrass
growing up in little clumps along the south side of the whitehouse
while i lean over jack, the jack russell curled up in my lap

darien’s hot chocolate (no milk) warm on the woodstove
(cocoa, some roasted/spicy pepper, a bit of cardamom and salt)
ladeled into a fine tea cup and sipped quick
between rounds of label 

the two candles i light and the book i take
with me and the bathtub full of warm/hot water
which is perhaps only the second bath i’ve taken here
in all 3 1/2 ears
the occasion: because there are only two of us on farm

how moonstar, because she is a skinny speedy all-black cat,
looks like a shadow as she trots along the path
on moon-bright nights like these 


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